Sex Magic For Beginners by Skye Alexander


I was recently sent a copy of Sex Magic For Beginners by author Skye Alexander. My blog is quoted several times within the book, and I’m listed in the works cited page.

Most of the books on the market dealing with sex magic concentrate on the sex aspect, and they usually ignore the magic aspect. Some of these books are nothing more than compilations of dirty pictures, and almost all of them seem focused on increasing sexual performance and enjoyment. I’m all for increased sexual performance and enjoyment, but if that’s all you want, you might as well just buy an issue of Cosmo.

I was pleasantly surprised to find out that Ms Alexander’s book isn’t about how to have great sex, but how to use sex inside of a magical operation. Some of what’s in the book doesn’t even directly deal with sex, but instead focuses on theories and techniques centered around energy manipulation and magic. That isn’t to say that the book doesn’t ever talk about increasing sexual pleasure, it does, but that isn’t the real focus of the book.

The book’s cover says that it’s the ‘Easy & Fun Way to Tap Into the Law of Attraction’, and that’s really the sort of magic this book tries to teach. This is a book about manifestation magic, or how to bring things into your life, whether that be material objects like money, or people like romantic partners, or even events, like winning a court case; and as the title suggests, the book’s method of producing this manifestation is through sex.

Ms Alexander has written several dozen books on a wide variety of topics, including Wicca, spellcraft, tarot, reflexology, and erotic fiction. This has made her somewhat of an expert on a lot of different spiritual subjects, and one of the cool things about the book is that she’s able to incorporate techniques pertaining to all of these other subjects into the realm of sex magic. Often times there’ll be a few paragraphs dealing with utilizing something like the tarot, or the I Ching, or reflexology.

She’s also managed to bring together techniques and ideas from a lot of different systems, including Western systems like Ceremonial Magic, Paganism, and Chaos Magic; and Eastern Systems like Buddhism and Taoism. She’s also included a lot from the New Thought movement. The New Thought Movement is a system that even many of the most open minded Ceremonialists and Pagans want nothing to do with, but it’s also one of the best systems to incorporate into this sort of magic. Manifestation magic is the thing that New Thought is centered around, and its the one kind of magic that it’s really good at.

Being an eclectic magician, I really love books like this that don’t solely concentrate on one system, but instead take the best parts from a lot of different systems and put them together into a workable, and more efficient, model.

This review’s probably too long already, but there’s one last thing I want to bring up. A good portion of the book is dedicated to different magical acts that you can try and different exercises to improve your magical abilities. A lot of books on the market are filled with theory, morals, spiritual speculation, personal accounts, and if you’re lucky some associations. The books I like, the books I find useful, and the books I think new magicians will get the most out of are books like this, which don’t just talk about magic, but give people instructions for real things they can go out and do after they’ve read it.

I don’t agree with everything in the book, but I agree with most of it, and the theory that the magic is based on is solid. It’s a great book for anyone interested in incorporating sexual acts into operations centered around manifestation magic. The book targets beginning magicians, but it’s also a useful book for more experienced magicians that are looking for some new ideas (I found a few things in the book I really want to try). My only real complaint about the book, and it’s the book’s biggest flaw, is that like sex, although there are some things that you can do by yourself, for the really cool stuff you need a partner.

Sex Magic and the Swinger Mentality

Sex magic is a fairly broad term that covers a lot of different practices. It includes everything from symbolically sexual rituals and intimate non-sexual rituals to actual sex and masturbation during a ritual. For the purposes of this article though, I’m only concerned with sex magic as defined as having actual ritual sex.

Sex magic is a valid and potentially powerful form of ritual magic. It can be used to reach higher states of ecstasy, to reach higher spiritual states of being, and to form stronger spiritual connections with your partner. It can also be used for more tangible gains, such as prosperity magic or love spells.

I’ve always been a strong proponent that sex magic works best within a long-term relationship. This isn’t magic that is done by yourself, this is magic that is done in a partnership, and the strength and experience of that partnership is a lot more important than the strength and experience of the individual practitioners. To reach the higher levels of what is attainable through sex magic, it isn’t enough just to develop oneself. The practitioner needs to develop themselves inside of the confines of a partnership and in specific regards to that relationship.

Sex magic works best within a long-term relationship, but there’s still a lot, magically, that can be gained from casual sex. Not everyone is going to be fortunate enough to be in a long term relationship with a fellow practitioner, and there’s still a lot that can be done and experimented with if you’re able to find another partner or two that’s willing to work with you.

However there’s an ideology that is counter-productive to sex magic that has entered the magical community by way of the swinger community. As far as I can tell, there are two types of swingers. There are a very few swingers who are fairly young and attractive. These people keep to their own kind, don’t associate with the other swingers, and, in the rare instance they enter the magical community, generally don’t get involved with sex magic. These folks are desirable, and there are always people willing to sleep with them.

The second type are unattractive. Many are older and even elderly, a large percentage are overweight, some of the men are underweight, most are out of shape, and some are just plain ugly. There usually isn’t anyone in this group that very many people would fantasize about sleeping with, and most people aren’t interested in seeing any of them naked. The problem the people in this group have is that the only people who will sleep with them are the other swingers like themselves. That might be fun for a while, but eventually some of these folks want to start sleeping with more attractive people. A big lure of swinging is getting to sleep with all sorts of attractive people, but that only really works if you happen to be an attractive person. This group also tends to have a high man to woman ratio, so there’s an incentive to get more willing women into the group.

One avenue some of these folks turn to is sex magic. It’s a way for these people to swing, and to hopefully bring in some younger and more attractive people with the lure of spirituality. No one is going to be enticed by the bodies these swingers have, so spirituality becomes an additional tool they can use to attract new partners.

Of course I take issue with the clear exploitation of someone else’s spirituality for sexual gain, but that isn’t the problem I want to talk right now. There’s a much bigger issue in that these swingers are damaging the effectiveness of sex magic by pushing an ideology which runs counter to it.

There’s an idea within the swinger culture that sex is not really connected to different emotions. Swingers are especially referring to love, but they also mean other emotions too. After all we’re not always in love with the people we have sex with, but that doesn’t mean that sex isn’t emotional for us. Most swingers believe that these emotional responses to sex are conditioned, as are certain other things connected to sex like intimacy and emotional closeness. They also believe that the best way to be is to recondition oneself so that all of these things are no longer connected to sex. Sex should just be a pleasurable physical act and nothing more.

This is a great ideology for a swinger. In fact I’d say it’s a necessary ideology if you want to be a swinger. How else can someone juggle an open marriage or deal with the emotional weight of having all of these various casual sexual partners?

When swingers move into the realm of sex magic, they bring this ideology with them. It’s a good ideology to bring with them, because it makes it easier for them to convince these young attractive people to have sex with them. Sex is promoted as a meaningless physical act, just like it is in the swinger community. The only difference is that in the swinger community the goal is physical pleasure, but here the goal is spiritual and obtained through ritual. In the magical setting sex becomes no different from drawing a circle on the ground or swinging a sword through the air. These are things most magicians wouldn’t think twice about doing if they believed it served some spiritual purpose, and these swingers would prefer it if we all thought the exact same way about having sex with them.

The problem is having ritual sex is just like drawing a circle on the ground or swinging a sword through the air. If you do either of those things as a purely physical and mechanical act, it isn’t going to do shit. Your just drawing lines in the dirt and pushing aside air molecules. It’s the intent, the energy, and the emotion that goes into these acts that empower them during the ritual.

Sex works the exact same way. In fact sex is such a great ritual tool because, even with casual sex, it’s usually wrapped up in emotions and intimacy and creates such strong bonds between the practitioners. The feelings of love and friendship and acceptance, the intimacy and closeness you feel when you give yourself to someone, feeling wanted and being touched by someone else, and even the lust of being with someone you’re genuinely attracted to are the sorts of things that empower sex in ritual.

These aren’t the sort of things we, as magicians, should be trying to remove from sex. These are the sorts of things we should be embracing, and the parts of sex we should be trying to further exploit in our own spells and rituals. Sex should be about feelings, that’s where its power lies.

Of course I doubt the swinger element will care much. I’ve talked to many of them, and I honestly believe they’re exploiting spirituality to get people to have sex with them. Even the ones who do have a genuine interest in magic usually don’t understand how to properly use sex within ritual. They also tend to be the sorts that believe that the only good spiritualities are the ones that either endorse their sexual habits or have no opinion about them. They’re often very offended by people who disagree with them about sex, or think that what they’re doing might be wrong or immoral.

Sex, Nudity, Magick, and Community Participation.

One of the more appalling aspects of the community, for me anyways, are people getting taken advantage of sexually. And it’s not that I don’t care or think its not as bad when people are taken advantage of another way, like say financially. It’s that people getting taken advantage of sexually, at least from what I’ve seen, is a much bigger problem in the community, partly because the behavior has become somewhat acceptable in the community.

I’m a very strong proponent of both sex magick and skyclad practice. Sex magick is a valid form of magical practice. It can yield results and their are a lot of unique aspects to it and interesting things to try. Inside of the right environment and with the right partners it can be a very spiritually rewarding experience. Plus I really like both sex and magick. In my eyes the fellow who first put the two together is a genius of the same caliber as the guy who thought to put a hamburger patty inside of two Krispy Kreme donuts.

As for skyclad practice, I’ve practiced skyclad in the past and actually prefer skyclad practice. I think it’s a spiritually beneficial practice and the positive aspects far outweigh the negative ones. I also think that there may be other non-spiritual advantages for at least some people, such as increased self-esteem and a more positive body image. Plus I think whatever it is you happen to be doing, you’d probably enjoy doing it more if you were naked.

Good luck putting together a skyclad group though (unless you hope to include only gay men or straight women). It’s even getting hard to have a serious discussion about sex magic in a group. And the big reason why we can’t have these things, why people aren’t willing to participate or at least experiment and try these things, is because we allow sexual predation in the community.

Most women are at least a little bit cautious about putting themselves into situations where they might be raped in some way. Most straight men won’t show up to a skyclad ritual unless there are at least a few women, which usually has more to do with either a fear of being tricked into showing up to a gay orgy or a fear of being labeled gay because they attended the event. And there are valid reasons for both men and women to be cautious of being raped or otherwise sexually used by both men and women, since sexual predators can be either gender and of any of any sexual orientation.

And attending an event where you and everyone else is expected to be naked isn’t really the safest situation not to get raped in. The only people who will attend those types of events (without some kind of manipulation at least) are people who feel relatively safe within the group, or people who would actually like to have sex with everyone present, men and women.

With a large mixed gender group of a dozen or more people, most people under normal circumstances would feel safe. In a group that large, you would expect that if one person grabbed you and tried to take you somewhere, or tried to rape you right in front of everyone, or even tried to take advantage of you, that the rest of the group would be completely appalled by their behavior. Not only would they defend you against the individual, but the individual would be ostracized from the group, and the group would cooperate with police which would probably result in the person being punished and ending up in prison.

That’s the case with a normal group. Not with a magical group. Go look at some magical groups within your local community. Within a lot of these groups, there is sexual predation happening, and the other group members accept this. Within the larger community there is also sexual predation happening which individual practitioners also accept. This may not be outright rape, but it’s still predation and it’s still wrong. The fact that this happens doesn’t inspire people to believe that if an outright rape did happen that the other participants would help them at all. They might allow it to happen, and even help to cover up the fact that it did happen. Even if that isn’t the case, it’s implied by the fact that they allow lesser offenses to happen.

Think about it, how many group leaders, teachers, and supposed community elders are requiring sex from certain people for initiation or teaching or other services? How many people are using spiritual arguments to convince people into sleeping with them that normally wouldn’t? How many people are playfully groping or touching others in ways that make them feel uncomfortable? And how much disgust do we see because of these behaviors?

Seriously I can’t remember the last time someone in the community, man or woman, talked about this stuff and was really upset that it was happening to someone else. Meanwhile I can’t even begin to count the amount of times people have jokingly referred to an older group leader’s habit of sexual initiations with teenage girls while at the same time having the utmost reverence and respect for him (and yes there was a specific guy like this in my local community to which I’m referring, who is still very well respected, but fortunately dead now).

I think it has a lot to do with the fact that many people look at alternative (ie non-Christian) spiritualities as doing away with a lot of oppressions, one of the big ones being sexual oppressions. Under our new spiritual beliefs sex is no longer typically a bad thing. Premarital sex is okay. Casual sex is okay. Homosexual sex is okay. Alternate sexual practices are okay. We come to the conclusion that the rules against sex inherent to Christianity and other religions were created for no other reason but to repress us and limit our pleasure, and not put into place because of some valid (at least at the time) concerns about certain sexual practices. Ultimately a lot of us have come to the conclusion that any kind of consensual sex, at least in regards to legal adults, is okay or even righteous and beautiful and shouldn’t be judged.

But that is simply not the case. Sex is not always an amoral act. Sex can be a very hurtful and destructive act, and engaging in consensual sex can be wrong.

There are of course little wrongs and big wrongs. People make mistakes within romantic relationships and other people get hurt, and sex is part of that. We’d all have to remain celibate and never so much as entertain the idea of dating anyone ever if we want to be safe from screwing up and risk hurting other people. At the same time I think most sexually active people can think of a time when they shouldn’t have slept with someone or did some other sexual act with them because it hurt someone they cared about.

The problem is the big wrongs. These are things any moral person knows is wrong before they do it, where they know they’re going to hurt the other person, and they do it anyways because they don’t care. When a person in their forties is having sex with an eighteen year old, there is something very wrong with that sexual relationship. We know the eighteen year old is being manipulated and taken advantage of.

Sexual harassment is wrong. It’s not wrong to express attraction or sexuality and people do sometimes get their signals crossed and maybe overstep a boundary and do something that is unwelcomed. However when a person makes it clear that certain advances or acts are unwelcomed and the second person continues to do them anyways, or when a person is put into a situation where they’re intimidated or otherwise led into believing that it would be unwise for them to express their discomfort this is harassment, and it’s wrong.

Basically any time that you get someone to have sex with you for any reason other then the fact that they like you, find you attractive, and want to have sex with you it’s wrong. When someone uses spirituality or spiritual arguments to have sex with someone else, that is wrong. In my eyes that’s one of the worst things you can do spiritually, because you’re trading your spirituality to almost rape someone.

We all know this argument. It’s used by lots of different predators. They use it to convince straight people to experiment and have homosexual sex. They use it to convince young people to have sex with old people. They use it to convince attractive people to have sex with overweight withered old hags. They use it to convince people to be polyamorous. They use it to convince people to engage in deviant sexual acts they normally would never want to try.

The arguments usually come in the forms of moving beyond your boundaries and doing things you normally wouldn’t do, or things that may outright disgust you, because this will give you greater magical power. I’ve also seen arguments along the lines of you should be willing to have sex with anybody because it will open up your options in regards to things like having sex with a demon possessed person during a ritual.

It’s one thing if a person makes the decision on their own that they would like to try new sexual acts they normally wouldn’t because they believe this may improve their spiritual self and then they go and seek out those acts. It’s another thing for a person to try to convince another of this for the sole purpose of having sex with them (under no circumstances should you ever take advice about who you should have sex with from someone who wants to have sex with you, unless they’re your spouse).

It’s also wrong for someone to withhold spiritual training, teaching or initiation from someone unless they have sex with them. It’s also wrong to try to convince someone that the only way to follow their spiritual path, reach their true potential, or achieve true initiation is through sex or a sexual act.

Most of the people in the community are not sexual predators. Most of us know these acts are wrong and would never do them or participate in them. The problem is that the vast majority of the community tolerates this behavior, or at best remains silent about it. And we shouldn’t do that, if not because it’s wrong then because we all end up labeled as sexual predators and we are all ultimately punished when we are no longer allowed to do or even talk about anything spiritually that may involve nudity or sex because no one will show up to our group or function because of it.

What we need to do is very simple. If we don’t tolerate this behavior, it will get better. If someone in your group, even a leader, is taking sexual advantage of people speak out against them. Talk to other members of the group, speak with their intended victims and offer your advice, and confront the person. And if the group does not kick the person out and make it clear that there behavior won’t be tolerated, leave and take as many members as you can with you.

If you know that the local shop owner or someone on their staff is taking sexual advantage of people, stop shopping there and inform as many customers as you can.

If you know someone is a sexual predator, don’t associate with them. Don’t allow them into your group. Don’t allow them at your functions. Make it very clear that you are not going to associate with them, and that you look disfavorably on anyone who does.

When people make light of and are generally accepting of a situation involving sexual predation, confront them about it. Make a scene and make them ashamed of the way they’re acting. Make it clear that they are doing something wrong by accepting this behavior, even if they aren’t the perpetrator, and that people in the community like yourself find this unacceptable.

And above all, talk about these things. With sexual predation or any other type of manipulation or fraud in the community, the thing that allows these people to continue to get away with this stuff is that people in the community don’t talk. The largest communities out there are still fairly small, small enough that word of mouth can move through them very fast. If you know someone is a sexual predator or if you know a group allows sexual predation, tell everyone you know. Ruin their reputation. I don’t understand it with all of the drama and bullshit and rumors floating around the community, but when it’s something important like a high priest/ess that rapes new initiates, no one ever wants to gossip about it.

We need to cut off membership to the groups that support this behavior. We need to stop shopping at stores that support this kind of behavior. And we need to ostracize and make it clear that no respectable person in the community will associate with or help people that are sexual predators. When we do this the worst of the predators will be kicked out of the community, and the rest will at least be restrained out of a fear that their actions will have very serious consequences.

BTW I apologize for the series of community rants that has recentally overtaken my blog. Next up I promise something that specifically deals with practical magic. Expect either a spell or ritual of some sort or an article on the properties of common herbs.

Magick Au Natural (or Skyclad), A Primer

What is Skyclad Magick

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Skyclad Magick is any working which is done nude (in other words clad only by the sky, although the term also encompasses indoor workings, which semantically should be called tracklightclad), whether these workings are done as a group or as solitary workings.

Skyclad also encompasses several different definitions. Some define Skyclad, most basically, as being without any kind of clothing. Others define it as also being without make-up, perfumes, deodorant, or shampoo. And others include those clothed in body paint as being skyclad.

The History of Skycladskyclad

It’d be nice if there was a long and revered history of ritual nudity to point to in arguing for skyclad practices, but none really exists. Although we see nudity practiced in some obscure forms of Eastern religions, we don’t see it in any of the ones that have had a major influence on the west. In the western world we can suppose that there has, in the past, been ritual nudity. Humans were most likely practicing some sort of ritual prior to the invention of clothing. We do know some of the Greeks and Romans were rather decadent and liked there orgies, and that there were probably some spiritual undertones in some of there orgy havings. But whatever was done then is largely lost, and we don’t see any clear lineage from those earlier rituals (which were small and minority rituals) up to the modern day.

Until the middle of the 20th century, Western occultism was practiced clothed. There is no evidence that traditional witches ever practiced in the nude. Ceremonial magicians have always practiced clothed. Even Allister Crowley, known for combining his sexual wants with his ritual practices, never managed to get into nude rituals, more than likely because he was too busy trying to convince male friends to have anal intercourse with him for reasons that meant he was still entirely heterosexual. There are some spells in the old grimoires that were meant to make groups of women or groups of people dance around in the nude, but that was not a part of the ritual, but rather the end result of it, after which the practitioner could then watch them dancing in the nude.

Skyclad magick and ritual nudity was pretty much spearheaded by Gerald Gardener, the founder of Wicca. The theological basis for Gardener’s skyclad rituals were based in negative Christian folklore about witches which supposed them to do secret nude rituals, and also in a mistranslation of a line in the Aradia of the Witches. It should be noted though that Gardener had a host of sexual fetishes, and that he used his spiritual position as a founder of a religion in order to recruit willing partners to participate in his fantasies which also included female domination and sado-machosism, and that he would grasp at spiritual straws to justify these acts.

After Gardener had come along, a lot of other folks started incorporating skyclad rituals into their own religions. Skyclad rituals meshed very well with the hippie movement that eventually invaded and took over most of the neopagan religions and also liked running around naked.

In recent years skyclad practices have largely fallen out of vogue. Even many Gardnerian Wiccans, who claim to practice the original form of Wicca created by Gardener, don’t practice skyclad, and they don’t follow a lot of Gardener’s more sexualized practices either. Most of the rituals that were originally meant to be done in the nude are now done clothed.

The Magick of Equality: Does Nudity Make Us Equals

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A point generally brought up by pro-skyclad Wiccans is that nudity makes us equals. We no longer have the class system attached to us. We aren’t separated between those who can afford nice clothes and those who can’t. This lack of separation would also happen if we replaced naked with modest robes.

Unfortunately beyond flashy clothes, skyclad doesn’t do much to make us equals. Some people are still pretty, and some are fat, and no amount of clothing, or lack thereof, is going to help the situation. Some of us are going to be more powerful than others. The regular religious hierarchies that exist tend to exist while naked the same as when clothed.

Cloth & Color: A Minor Variable Sidestepped

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It should be noted that the most magickal possessions most people possess (other than their bed), are their clothes. Experienced practitioners are more likely than most to have an object which puts their clothes to shame, but at the same time their clothes are going to be even more magickal than what is typical among non-practitioners. Our emotion and our energy, through out the day, taints our clothes. Washing our clothes helps, although it doesn’t nearly do enough insofar as cleansing them. The longer the clothes have been worn, the more powerful they may be. And our clothes, in turn, may taint or otherwise affect both ourselves or the ritual. When we enter a ritual clothed, we’re never entering a ritual clean. Many books recommend not only preritual baths and cleansings, but also special clean garments only adorned during ritual for this very reason.

Secondly, color is another variable. Some practitioners discard color altogether because it is not as strong a symbolism as some would like. Color does however have an, albeit minor, effect on magick workings. Some books and practitioners swear by being draped in the proper colors for the spell at hand.

However clothing and color are both minor variables in determining the success and power of ones magick. Neither is so great a factor that it can’t be overcome, or can only be over come with great effort. There are of course exceptions. Sometimes an article of clothing can become so energized that it will have a very serious effect on the ritual. However this problem can be solved simply by wearing something else.

Still, it should be noted that these things can affect ritual, and that by practicing skyclad these variables no longer need to be considered.

Simplicity, Primality, Transformation, and Butt-Nakedness

Nakedness is our most natural state of dress. It’s how we come into this world. It’s how we survived as a species prior to the advent of clothing. Our clothing ads another layer to ourselves, another level of complexity. Typically within magick and ritual one moves towards simplicity rather than complexity, one tries to remove as many layers from the problem as possible. Simplicity is seen as the better and more powerful state, the natural state of things within the universe, and it’s easiest to work ones will when that will is worked in the natural directions of the universe, not against it.

Naked, being both our natural state and primary state, allows us to become more primal in our being. For some being naked means tapping into a more primary, animalistic state. For others it is just being more free, less inhibited, and a closer approximation to their true self. In any case, in this state a practitioner’s energy is more raw, less encumbered and tainted, and the practitioner experiences a greater degree of focus and their will and desires are better focused, all of this making spellwork easier and more successful.

Finally some practitioners may use nudity as a trigger to transform them from one state to another. To move from their normal selves to their more magickal selves. To help them cast away, temporarily, their anchors and ties into the real and solid world and move into a less solid more magickal state where more things are possible. Conditioned properly, a practitioner can see a dramatic transformation between a clothed and naked state, and can amass this power with less work than what would typically be required. However one should be careful utilizing this method. There are definite drawbacks to not being able to tap most of your power unless you’re naked.

Intimacy, Nudity, and Bonding

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Most people see nudity as an intimate act. For most of us, the first people of an opposite gender who saw us naked after puberty started was a person who we engaged in some intimate carnal act with. For most of us, most of the people of the opposite gender who see us naked are people we are intimately involved with. For a lot of people, nudity is directly tied to sex. For a lot of people, casual and non-utilitarian nudity is only something that occurs between two people who are sexually involved with each other.

The point being, for a large part nudity and intimacy are one in the same. Therefor when a ritual is performed skyclad there is an added degree of intimacy between the participants, even if they don’t know each other very well. With a regular group, this intimacy helps with group bonding. But even with strangers who will never meet again, nudity will help them connect together, become one, and work the ritual as a single whole rather than a group of individuals. The individual members will also find it easier to connect to one and another, and psychic links will more easily form between them, once again making it easier for the individuals to work as a group.

Symbolism of Nudity and Opening the 3rd Eye

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When we’re naked, we’re exposed. We’ve completely opened ourselves up and exposed ourselves to everything in the nearby area. This is a literal truth on the physical level. But is also symbolic of opening ourselves up and exposing ourselves emotionally (thus intimacy, as explained above), and also opening ourselves up spiritually. Being naked is symbolic of letting down a shield, and both exposing ourselves and opening ourselves up to our surrounding environment. Especially when the symbolism of the event is acknowledged, this will make it easier for the practitioner to experience the metaphysical. For lack of a better way to describe it, it will make them more psychic and more empathic.

Sacred Nudity and Reverence

Most of us, when we present ourselves to a god, we want to present ourselves in an acceptable way. The situation may not always allow this. We might need to contact a deity right now, and we can’t wait to take a shower or dress ourselves properly. The gods understand this. But a lot for the time we do have time. And then there’s the question of how should we present ourselves. Likewise even when we don’t use a god, when we do magick most of us would like to present ourselves in a way that is becoming of the sacredness of the event.

If we have sacred clothes, like ceremonial robes, this might do. If not, we’d usually lean towards nice, clean clothes. What nice means though would be very subjective. Some might define that as expensive suits and dresses. Others as unfaded jeans and a favorite t-shirt. Some will argue that you should always address the gods in Renfair costumes, regardless of the fact that almost every god predates the renaissance style of dress, the style was only in vogue in certain regions of Western Europe and is thus regionally inappropriate for most gods, and that Renfair costumes typically lack accuracy.

Nudity is, however, always appropriate for presentation to a deity or a sacred event. Nudity is a sacred state of being. As already mentioned it’s how we come into this world. When we disrobe we’re also gracing those around us with the beauty of our physical form. We are making a sacrifice of our modesty so that others may take pleasure in our natural form. We are showing reverence to and making a gift to those around us, be they other humans, entities, or gods. When we are naked, we’re always in a sacred state. The sacredness of that state is only lost when we attempt to hide or cover ourselves, or when we try to stop or otherwise punish others for looking at us or particular body parts, staring at us, or having impure thoughts about us. When we disrobe and present ourselves as such it is a sacred gift given onto the recipient, to be used as they please and not to be taken back.

Nudity and Sexual Energy

Nudity can be utilized within ritual in order to raise sexual energy. When you get a bunch of people together, running around naked, they start getting horny, and before long you get a bunch of sexual energy that can be used and manipulated in the spellwork. For best results you want as many pretty people, both men and women, in the group as possible. Pretty people turn other people on. Ugly people may turn other people on, but not as much. Youth is also good, young people tend to have much stronger sex drives and more sexually repressed energy. You may also have much better results if participants agree to refrain from sexual acts or masturbation for a period preceding the ritual. Three days is a good amount of time. Likewise you’ll get better results if flirting and some petting is allowed during the time of the ritual, of course you don’t want anyone having orgasms during the ritual, since that would be counterproductive, you just want them getting about as close as you can get them.

In a setting like this, energy can easily be raised, even among those who are not very good at energy manipulation, by normally mundane acts like dancing around each other and various games and activities that involve touching and caressing each other.

Orgies

Generally, if you want to raise sexual energy, don’t have sex. There is a point within an orgasm when the energy will hit peak and will be at its strongest for the individual. This only lasts for a moment though, and grasping and manipulating this energy is a difficult feat. It can be done, but it is typically beyond the ability of most practitioners and beyond the scope of most rituals. But there are other things that can be done with ritual orgies, everything from connecting the group as one to amassing the energies to some ends to simply reveling in a state of primal and uncompromising sexual ecstasy and desire. I do think that this is, however, far to vast an area to go into detail in the scope of this essay.

Being Naked — Just Because

Of course there is something to be said for being naked just because. It is a sacred state of being, and so being naked is sacred. It can be its own ends, rather than a means to something else. It can be a spiritual experience in and of itself. Or possibly just something one enjoys doing. To be exposed, open, uninhibited, intimate, free, primal, and sacred all at once.

A Treatise on Sex Magick

In Heaven they make love, on Earth they have sex, but down here in Hell, down here they fuck – David Hopkins

Methods of Sexual Magick

There are two different methods of sexual magick, one based on exploitation and one based on equality. Within the physical realm sex has been degraded from its original purified form as it is performed within the higher realms. As a result sex has been split into two sides, the masculine and the feminine, each of which performs a different function in sexual intercourse. It is the job of the masculine partner to release energy, to pleasure, to dominate, and to generally be in control of sexual intercourse. Meanwhile it is the job of the feminine partner to accept energy, to be pleasured, to submit, and to generally surrender to the act of intercourse. These ideas are expressed in all parts of typical, vanilla male-female sexual relations. The semen is ejaculated from the man, and it is received by the woman. A much greater emphasis is usually put on pleasuring the female partner and bringing her to orgasm. The female orgasm is usually more intense and less inhibited than the more controlled male orgasm. After sex men are typically drained and sleepy where as women are energized and awake. These same inequalities exist within typical homosexual relations, with each partner choosing either a masculine or feminine role for each individual act. Likewise the roles can be reversed within a heterosexual relationship where the female is the masculine partner and the male is the feminine partner.

According to Hebrew folklore the first wife of the proto-man, Adam, was Lilith, who saw herself as Adam’s equal and who Adam turned away because she sometimes wanted to be on top during sex. After Lilith Adam came to be with Eve who was submissive. This act by Adam could be seen as the original choice of mankind to choose its place in the universe. To have sex as it is had in the highest planes, to be genderless, and to be partners of a complete equality, or alternatively to create a duality of gender and to create an inequality of sexual roles. Lilith is often vilified and shown to represent darker aspects of sexuality and the lower realms, but in reality Lilith is a representation of the highest forms of sexual intercourse. Some versions of the lovers card show a man between two women, one a respectful woman and one a slut. This can be seen as a representation as Adam’s original choice between Eve and Lilith, and as an extension the choice given to each of us to choose the path of inequality or equality in our sexual relationships. Typically in the tarot the respectful woman is to the left of the man, the left generally signifying that which belongs to the lower planes, where as the slut is to the right, which signifies the higher planes.

Within the exploitation method of sexual magick the partners seek to exploit the different roles of the genders in order to cause some effect. Because we don’t exist in the lowest planes, or even a plane that is below the center point, the gender split is not absolute or completely defined. Often times the exploitation method involves debasing sex even further and delving into its lower realm forms. This type of sexual magick can be used for a variety of effects, such as transferring power, ability, energy, or knowledge between partners, or using it for healing in order to extract something negative from one partner or to rebalance the energies of both partners. The most basic and common use of exploitation sexual magick is the combination of the masculine ability of creation with the feminine ability of union which results in creating a child in the image of oneself, the supreme act of god. An extreme example of the exploitation method in action on a lower realm would be the Succubi which, like all sexual vampires, acts as a super receptor feeding off of the masculine counterpart until they are sucked completely dry and everything of value is taken from them.

There is the second method of sexual magick, that of equality. Using this method the partners seek not to exploit the natural order of sex in order to unlock its powers, but rather to modify and twist it so that it resembles itself as seen on the higher planes and unlocking the inherent power of those planes. In contrast to exploitation sexual magick, equality magick seeks not to create a child in the image of self, but rather to rather to recreate oneself through union with another.

The four roles of sexual intercourse.

During sexual intercourse there are four distinct roles that a person can take. They can be a woman having sex with a man, a man having sex with a woman, a woman having sex with a woman, and a man having sex with a man. Each of these roles is distinct, each corresponds to an element and one of the four kabbalistic worlds, and each, in the order they are presented, represents a higher and more evolved form of sexual intercourse. Typical homosexual intercourse is a higher form than heterosexual intercourse because it doesn’t seek to produce offspring and is more naturally an equality, although it lacks the completeness of heterosexual intercourse.

A Woman Having Sex With a Man – represented by Earth and belonging to Asiah, this is the lowest and most base role in sexual intercourse. This is the dead fish technique of love making. The woman at this stage is defined as solid and stagnant. She makes no aggressive actions and makes no attempt to heighten the experience of her mate. Any action she takes is reactionary and typically involuntary. She simply lies motionless in a relaxed state as her counterpart attempts to pleasure her and bring her into orgasm. She is a receptacle that waits to receive that which is given to her.

A Man Having Sex With a Woman – Represented by Air and belonging to Yetzirah, this is the level which is usually sought after with what is known in modern times as tantric sex. This stage is defined by techniques, creativity, skill, and sexual know-how. At this stage the goal is to bring ones partner to the highest level of sexual ecstasy possible. This does involve being in control of sexual intercourse, but with the intent of making the experience the best it can be for ones partner, never with the intent of heightening ones own sexual experience. The male orgasm is inconsequential, and almost always guaranteed anyways. The semen from ejaculation, as with every other act and functioned performed by the male, is meant as a gift to be freely received by the female.

A Woman Having Sex With a Woman – Represented by Water and belonging to Beri’ah, this is defined by a double receptacle and a purity of union. In this stage the woman reacts to her partner, anticipating her needs and hoping to both pleasure her partner and receive her partner. A person at this stage must be in synch with her partner and have an intimate knowledge of them. The two are meant to flow effortlessly together as one like water, and completely surrender themselves to becoming one with their mate. Where as the previous stage relied upon knowledge and thought, this stage relies upon emotion and intuition. The woman is neither defined as dominant or submissive, nor does she try to control or submit the sexual union, instead she is what it is necessary for her to be at the moment, and as both are defined as a singular one here, both are at the same time in control and submissive.

A Man Having Sex With a Man – Represented by Fire and belonging to Atziluth, this stage is defined by a double aggressor. In this stage the man seeks only to pleasure himself without any regard to his partner, his pleasure, or his experience. The man attempts to control the situation and seeks only what will please him most at the moment. Because both partners seek to only pleasure themselves at this stage a sort of equality is maintained, although the end result is often times an aggressive and violent fight to control intercourse.

There are a few notes that have to be made. First off, gender of self or of ones partner is not an absolute restriction on which role a person may play in sexual intercourse. In fact, it is not even a determination of the likely role a person will play in sexual intercourse. Secondly, elements almost always exist as an impurity, and as such more often than not a person will find themselves not being a purity in any of the four stages, but rather leaning moreso towards one stage than the other three. And finally, there are not four combinations, but rather sixteen. The first partner may align with any of the four elements as described above, and the second partner may align with any of the four elements independent of which element the first partner is currently aligned with. For example, partner one may be a woman having sex with a man, but partner two may be a man having sex with a man.

The first stage represents ignorance, the second stage requires and represents knowledge of sexual intercourse, the third stage requires and represents knowledge of ones partner, and the fourth stage requires and represents knowledge of self.

Combining The Four Elements and the Fifth Degree

There are not four elements, but five. The fifth element, spirit, is described as being a combination of the four other elements. When a person encompasses all four elements at once they become represented by spirit and are no longer a man or a woman but a hermaphrodite. When both partners engage in sex as true hermaphrodites this leads into the fifth stage, a hermaphrodite having sex with a hermaphrodite, which is represented by spirit, and which does not belong to any of the four kabbalistic worlds, but transcends them, the tree of life, the known universe, ect. and belongs to an entirely higher plane of existence all together.

The basic law of like attracts like comes into play here. Things that are alike are attracted to each other, things that are unalike repel each other. As with all things, this is true of planes of existence. When two partners come together in union as an equality, each being a true hermaphrodite, they momentarily create a state where they repulse this world, in fact all four kabbalistic worlds, and as they are repelled from it are drawn beyond these worlds into that which exists above the four worlds, and for a moment the full ecstasy, majesty, and power of the higher realm is available to them. At the same time though, being of spirit, they encompass all of the lower realms, and their power is not restricted from them. They have what, when seen from this perspective, is absolute power over all things.

Some Notes on Techniques

Many attempts have been made to better understand this puzzle through sexual exercise. Gardner managed to figure out to reverse the common roles of male dominance and female submissiveness, and experimented with the idea of bondage and sado-masochism, however in doing so he only managed to dig himself deeper into the lower realms. Crowley experimented with both homosexuality and heterosexuality which no doubt gave him a deeper understanding of certain roles, although practicing bisexuality isn’t necessary nor does it teach everything.

The process of achieving the fifth stage is not something that one can progress at by themselves. Reaching that goal is a partnership. Crowley’s method of constantly changing sexual partners, for instance, was a major hindrance because every time Crowley changed partners he had to start the process over again almost from scratch, despite any personal growth on his part or the degree of expertise already possessed by his partner. The individuals accomplishments are almost completely meaningless in the final equation, it is the accomplishments of the current partnership that matters.

In order to get to the fifth stage the partners need to get to learn about each other and know each other mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically, and sexually. They should then experiment with the sixteen combinations until each feels comfortable with every combination. Finally each should work on combining the four stages and achieving the fifth stage.

Sexual Kinks

Sexual acts and kinks typically belonging to the lower realms: dominance-submission, humiliation, bondage, pleasure via pain (spankings, cannings, whippings), degradation, cuckold (submissive or dominant), necrophilia, CFNM and CMNF (not always, but typically, especially with the former), frotteurism, agalmatophilia, secret voyeurism, molestation and age regression, rape and rape fantasy.

Sexual acts and kinks typically belonging to the higher realms: bisexuality, strap-on sex, exhibitionism (dependent on circumstances), gender reversals.

The majority of acts are neither regulated to the higher or lower realms. As a general rule, any act which produces a negative emotion (such as fear, anxiety, or humiliation), even when consensual and when resulting arousal, pleasure, and/or sexual gratification, any act which seeks to create a dominant and submissive or superior and inferior partner, and any act which is forced are regulated to the lower realms, even when such acts are entirely role-playing or fantasy.

As a general rule, any particular fetish or kink that is necessary for sexual arousal, pleasure, and/or gratification or is highly preferred is a major hindrance to achieving a higher state of sexual union. Likewise an aversion to a large number of acceptable kinks and general experimentation is also a major hindrance.

Sex is Sticky

This is a post I made maybe 3+ years ago to a now defunct yahoo! group. For whatever reason I kept it, and it has some interesting, albeit basic, thoughts on sex energy and sex magick.

Unfortunately I haven’t been able to play around with sex energy as much as I would like to. But I have noticed some differences with sex energy as opposed to other types, mainly being that it’s very sticky.

What I mean by that is that it’s very easy to attach something to sex energy, and that even naturally things tend to become attached to it. And of course sex energy is released from a person when they have sex, although they can draw it right back in if they know how. But if they don’t draw it back in, not only is the sex energy lost, but so is whatever was stuck to it.

It really doesn’t take any effort at all to do this on a basic level. Mundanes do this. It’s commonly known that sex can be used to relieve stress (this will be a minor plot device in 50% of the new sitcoms airing this week, I’m semi-psychic :). And now psychiatrists are saying that having sex regularly can help with all levels of depression. And this is what is occuring without effort, with effort it can be used for much greater effect.

Another thing I noticed about sex, even prior to any metaphysical thought about it, is that it’s sort of a boiling pot. It mixes easily with nearly anything and changes. Sex can be mixed with love, or compassion, or anger, or anything else and the end result will be slightly different.

I’ve also talked to some metaphysical healers who have claimed that they are able to use sex magick to heal (in a metaphysical way, not in a physical way), which makes me think that it may be possible for disease to stick to sex energy too.

A few things I’m wondering about and have noted about this:

I’d actually be curious to look at different specific types of entities that are predatory and feed off of sexual energy. I’m guessing what would be found is that in most cases a specific type targets only certain types of individuals determined largely by their general demeanor. The idea being that the entity would have a preference for certain emotions being intermixed with the sex energy, and a repulsion to other emotions.

Another thing, which should go without saying anyways but some people I’ve met really could’ve used someone saying it to them, if a person is going to play around with sex magick and sexual energy, then they should be particular about who exactly their partner is and be sure that they’re compatable.

I’m also thinking that sex can be used for a sort of cleansing effect, and that it is used that way naturally among mundanes from time to time. Basically a way to throw all of the shit out of you, and empty yourself to fill yourself back up how you naturally are.

Now based on the idea that sex energy can be released, that it’s sticky and things are easily attached to it, and that this energy can be reabsorbed by another, I’m thinking that sex can be used as a sort of courior between two people.

On the simpler level, it can be used to transmit simple thoughts and emotions between to people. Or it can be used as a means to communicate information which cannot be communicated through typical means. Or it can be used to send outward some part of oneself to be
absorbed by another.

I’m realizing this while I’m writing the post, but it seems as if this is filling up some of the gaps in what sex becomes as it ascends to higher stages. This seems to fit between what is typical of the physical world and what is a bit higher than that, and actually binding two entities together through sex. It seems to fit together nicely now. A bit later on I may post the different levels of sex that I know of and see if anyone else can add to them or fill in any other gaps. I have to put some things together in my head first though.

Secrets to Sex Magick: A Guide to Ultimate Power

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First, certain thereoms need to be taken as fact, or proven as fact, that:

1. All things have a perfect state, that his state exists at the zenieth of all planes, and as anything rises up the planes they achieve this state to a greater degree, and that this state is of greater strength, purity, and simplicity (conversely a similiar, if not entirely mirrored state should exist at the absolute depth of all planes, and this state can also be achieved by moving into that direction, however being closer to the zenieth of all planes than the depth, it is an easier achievement to move upward rather than downward).

2. As all things fall down from the planes they become more complex and impure and as a result are both weakened and fractioned off into smaller pieces.

3. That where we are is somewhere above center, but closer to the middle than the zenieth of all planes of being.

4. That a sexual union of two entities follows all of these rules. That as a generality the sexual unions made in this world are impure and highly corrupted from their perfected form and as a result base. That sexual unions, as occuring in this world, are also fractioned and incomplete, there existing many different kinds of sexual unions which can be defined in many different ways (by method, by emotion being expressed, by deviancy, by purpose, ect.).

5. That higher forms of a physical sexual union can be achieved, both through intense emotions expressed by both partners in the act of intercourse and through means of sexual magick.

6. That even higher forms of sexual union exist, these forms being entirely spiritual, and as sexual union moves towards its perfected form it becomes more and more an act of both union and creation, as souls literally exchange their parts to become eternally bound to each other and recreate themselves as entirely new entities, and that in its perfected state the two souls entirely merge into one for all eternity, creating an entirely new being.

7. That when the universe (or this particular multiverse if you prefer) began there was but a single entity in which all there is existed and all of creation sprung forth from this entity (this entity bearing no relation to the judeo-christian god), hereafter refered to as the all, to give it a name.

8. That the all, as a single entity, was limited and could not evolve and exceed itself.

9. That this all no longer exists as a single entity, that it was itself split in order to create all things, and that it only exists as the sum of the entirety of everything.

10. That when the all first split it created two halves, hereafter known as the male and female, and that each half could evolve, becoming more than a half of a whole, but that regardless of evolution neither half could ever equal the all. However between the two halves every power of the all existed (going back to judeo-christian mythology, God’s greatest act was to create man and woman in the image of himself (each being a half to His whole), and these two halfs, brought together in union, could recreate this act, making children in the image of themselves).

11. And so all things in existance are less than the first which created everything and can never evolve into more than the first.

12. That each of us exists as a half to a perfect whole, split into a male and female side. That these sides have nothing to do with gender. That for every half that exists in the universe, there is exactly one other half which perfectly fits it. There are however many other halves which kind of fit it, or mostly fit it, or even almost perfectly fit it.

13. That this is true of all things, be they insects or men or angels or gods, that each has a perfect half that exists somewhere else.

Leading to the conclusion that:

14. When two perfect halves which have equally evolved engage in an act of perfect sexual union and unify as a single entity that their sum will have exceeded that of the all which first created everything, and that they will have evolved into an even greater entity, something beyond the entirety of everything, and this evolution is the penultimate goal of all things.